Veterans Day in Magnolia

I serve in the United States Marine Corps Reserve, out in Texarkana, TX. I love my service, but like any government job, it could always be better. I noticed many things in town that corresponded with Veterans Day and the Monday after it. Post offices and banks were closed, the School held a ceremony for the veterans in the community, and many fast food locations and restaurants either gave away free things or offered extreme discounts for veterans. While it may seem all grand and great, I didn't participate in any of it.

It unnerves me and makes me feel awkward when I am thanked for my service. Sure, there may have been a couple of times where I was in real danger, but those were situations that almost resulted in a full-on training accident. The most I've shot the machinegun at is green Ivan targets that bounce back when you hit them, screaming loud and proud that the little plastic man had gone down.

In a lot of ways, I don't feel like a veteran. All I really do is balance a civilian life with only the 'possibility' of being deployed. Most of my time is spent working on our military vehicles, cleaning weapons, and of course, PT. I go home, I go to class, and I can sometimes hear people say, "oh, that's Rhett - he's a Marine." While I may have earned the title through boot camp, I just don't feel like I reflect on it the way I should. I don't feel as though its the recognition I should receive.

I haven't deployed. I haven't shot and killed the enemy. I haven't suffered enough to be thanked. Sure, I went to boot camp and it was a haze-fest, I've injured my hip twice and now I hurt every day, I have some anxiety issues but for what? I still don't believe I've done enough. I'm not Dan Daley or Kyle Carpenter. I'm Rhett Gentry, college student and kind of a Marine. My buddy in the National Guard doesn't participate because he feels awkward as well, while many of my fellow Marines at my unit feel great to go to IHop and get some free pancakes.

So, when Veterans Day came around, I didn't run to Wendy's demanding my free Jr. Frosty. I didn't go to the ceremony, because even if most veterans are not combat-vets, there will be at least one in there that deserves the recognition for his gallant behavior that I have not been tested on. Who knows, maybe I will deploy someday. Earn some medals and have them pinned to my chest, then come home like a proper hero. Then, I will feel alright getting that Jr. Frosty.

Last of all, I don't like being treated like a first-rate citizen. My "service" doesn't make me any better of a person than anyone else. If you try your hardest every day, you're just as good as me if not better. The extra treatment feels strange and almost alien. Its as if some people feel like it is expected out of them and it is an incredibly awkward situation on both sides of the spectrum. This idea of "service for service" doesn't feel right to me. For the Marine Corps birthday, veterans day, and the following monday, I spent my time with my family, friends, and girlfriend to appreciate the time I'm able to have with them that many of my brothers unfortuantely don't have the opportunity to do.